Rogers Family Therapy
adults, couples & families
"The serious problems of life, however, are never fully solved.
If it should for once appear that they are, this is the sign that something has been lost.
The meaning and design of a problem seem not to lie in its solution, but in our working at it incessantly."
Timothy Rogers, MA, LMFT
Licensed Psychotherapist MFC101500
BE, MY SELF, & WHY
Hi I'm Tim and I am a California State Licensed Marriage & Family Therapist (MFC101500). I hold a Master's Degree in Counseling Psychology, and am in pursuit of my PhD in Clinical Psychology with an emphasis in Depth Psychology.
HOW I APPROACH THERAPY
Just as not everyone therapist is a good fit for every client, there are particular aspects of a client's personality that I've found work best with me. I conceptualize that the bottom line to why anyone participates in psychotherapy is as a function for the discovery of Self-identity. Yes, it may be a crisis (infidelity, school issues, loss of a relationship) that brings you in. But it seems to me that deciding to look at your Self, choosing a life worthy of examining is a much deeper and powerfully consistent theme I see with those whom I'm privileged enough to work.
"Who are you, REALLY?
Therapy is about asking your Self: "Who are you, REALLY? Then determining what meaning purpose YOU have and what are will do with this gift called life; How? Through relationship. We need people who are going to reopen our wounds. That’s the only way we heal them. We can’t heal by avoiding. We heal by going through, not 'getting over it.' but by reopening, by learning, by feeling the pain and transforming it with the people who will stand by us as we do. Because if we don't transform our suffering, we will transmit it.
IT’S FINALLY ALL ABOUT YOU
You don’t have to be hopeful about the future. It’s enough just to be curious about what is coming. The relationship I hope to establish with you is one in which we both gain insight into how you work best.
It's a relationship that is professional and intimate. Authentic and empathic. Respectful of boundaries while prioritizing the need for a safe space where you can feel safe enough to really be your Self.
To be able to say anything that comes to mind, and feel as though no subject is too taboo or off limits including any feelings about me that come up for you. Psychotherapy is not a procedure performed upon one person by another. It is a dialogue between personal universes, and it transforms both. (George Atwood)
NOT SO SIMPLE SYMPTOMS
The genesis of our work is with addressing the symptoms of trauma. Yes, that thing(s) that happened to you as s child, and those words said and messages sent to you that became your inner voice “counts” as trauma. Those experiences produced ways of coping that have been effective (until they aren’t) and which are the benchmarks or symptoms of complex trauma. I successfully treat such symptoms as drug/alcohol abuse, anxiety, depression, infidelity and low Self worth.
SELF IN TRUTH
Once the symptoms have been treated long enough (of which you, me and your defenses will determine), your treatment will be focused on getting to the root of what you have been experiencing as unsatisfying, unsure or unknown to you. Our work together is an authentic relationship. It is this relationship, one in which trust has been established and boundaries taught and implemented that will help heal your trauma, in finding your lifelong pursuit of feeling comfortable with who you truly are. Together, we will help you reclaim your true Self. “Of all the things trauma takes away from us, the worst is our willingness, or even our ability, to be vulnerable. There's a reclaiming that has to happen.” (Brene Brown)
In the “end,” your symptoms consistently managed to the point of extinction, your Self prioritized and your feelings (and therefore you) valued, your therapy can terminate with revealing your purpose. Think of this phase of therapy not so much as the why are you here, but how will you get started? Unearthing your answer to the mystery of your existence is not only “next level” therapy, it can actually be the point. Now that you have more accurate information about your Self, that's when the real work can begin! In accepting, implementing and mentoring others with the good that we know, feel and behave like we are. What seemed impossible or overwhelming in life can now be considered more consistently relieving because we know, feel and behave in ways that says to our Selves and others (in that order): "I matter."
LASTING A LIFETIME
Remembering who you are does take work. But just because it's work, doesn’t mean it has to feel labor intensive. Due to many different circumstances beyond your control in childhood, you may have forgotten your Self. But if you, your partner and/or members of your family choose to team up with me in being courageous rather than critical of your emotional responses and can pause before your physical reactions; then you can each learn how to be attracted to what’s healthy, and I can be the last Therapist you see.
If you have questions about sex and protection/contraception...Planned Parenthood at
1-800-230-plan or It's Your Sex Life at 1-8888-Be-SAFE-
If you think you have an STD...STD Info Line at 1-800-227-8922
For emergency contraception...Emergency Contraception Hotline at 1-888-not.2.late
If you've been abused...National Child Abuse Hotline at 1-800-422-4453
If you're going through a crisis...Youth Crisis Hotline at 1-800-448-4663
If you've run away or need shelter...Covenant House at 1-800-999-9999
For info on a Planned Parenthood Clinic near you...Planned Parenthood at 1-800-230-plan
For general advice...Teen Help at 1-800-840-5704